LITTLE OLD WOMAN'S CRIME
 

Defence Attorney: What is your age?
 
Little old Woman:
I am 86 years old.
 
 
 
 
Defence Attorney: Will you tell us,
in your own words,
what happened to you?
 
 
 
 
Little old Woman:
There I was, sitting there
in my swing on my front porch
 on a warm spring evening,
 
 
when a young man comes
creeping up on the porch
and sat down beside me.
 
 
Defence Attorney: Did you know him?
 
 
Little old Woman:
 
 
 
No, but he sure was friendly.
 
 
Defence Attorney: What happened after he sat down?
 
 
Little old Woman:
 
 
He started to rub my thigh.
 
 
Defence Attorney: Did you stop him?
 
 
Little old Woman:
 
 
No, I didn't stop him.
 
 
Defence Attorney: Why not?
 
 
Little old Woman:
It felt good.
 
 
Nobody had done that since
my Abner passed away some 30 years ago.
 
 
Defence Attorney:  What happened next?
 
 
Little old Woman:
 
 
He began to rub my breasts.
 
 
Defence Attorney: Did you stop him then?
 
 
Little old Woman:
 
 
 No, I did not stop him.
 
 
Defence Attorney:  Why not?
 
 
Little old Woman:
Why, Your Honour,
 
 
 
his rubbing made me
feel all alive and excited.
I haven't felt that good in years!
 
 
Defence Attorney:  What happened next?
 
 
Little old Woman:
Well, I was feeling so spicy that I just
laid down and said to him...
 
 
"Take me ... young man...Take me!"
 
 
Defence Attorney: Did he take you?
 
 
Little old Woman:
Hell, no.
 
 
He just yelled, "April Fool ! ".
... And that's when ...
 
 
 
 
 
 
I shot the little bastard.
 

 

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