This is being sent to you
because we know you are critically
interested in your front lawn,
 and this summer season will soon be upon us.
This is a fertilizer club
 and will not cost you a cent to join.

receipt of this letter,
 go to the address at the top of this list
and poop on their front lawn.
 You won't be the only one there,
 so don't be embarrassed.
 Then make five of this letter
 and send it to five of your friends
 who appreciate good lawns.
 You will not get any money or checks
 but within one week if this chain is not broken,
 there will be 9,216 people pooping on your front lawn
Your reward will come next summer
when you will have the greenest lawn
in your neighbourhood.

Mrs. Lucy Bowel
19 Bedpan Cover
Wemouth, Mass.

Mrs. Paula Crapp
222 Enema Drive
Quincy, Mass

Mrs. Charles Syringe
109 Suppository Drive
Fink, Texas

Mrs. Smelly B. Hind
416 Diarrhoea Way
Kansas City, Missouri

Mrs.O Howie Farts
896 Rectum Road
Washington, DC

Mrs. A. Bigger Movement
276 Fertilizer Way
Melton, Mass.

If you are constipated,
pass this along to your neighbours.
One man didn't give a poop
and lost his entire lawn.

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Last Updated - 07 June 2006